Work != Effort
I started reading Scott Berkun’s blog about a month ago after I started to really get into his book, The Art of Project Management. He has a very clear perspective on what it means to actually accomplish something (and even have a good plan for what that something is), and I’ve grown to really enjoy his insights (and stories). He recently posted the following to his blog:
Everyone in the tech-sector goes through a phase early in their career where they’re proud of their hours. At software and consulting companies everwhere, circles of 20 something friends debate, over drinks each night, who’s put in crazier hours - “I worked 70 hours last week”, “70? I worked 70 hours in 3 days.” “3 days? I worked 70 hours this morning, before breakfast.” And on it goes. It’s a kind of dumb male pride in size of things, rather that quality or, god forbid, actual hapiness. To work 70 hours is a statement of work, not of progress. For every idiot working 70 hours there’s a smarter, wiser man who’s doing the same amount of work in 50 because he’s paying more attention to results than the clock. I’d rather be, and rather hire, that man.
You can also read the original post if you like. I liked this whole post, because it really hits on an issue that I’m continually grappling with. I’m still that guy in his twenties that thinks more hours is more better. At some level, I know that’s not the case, and I feel like I’ve gotten a lot better. But still, my friends all tend to agree that I still work to hard. I think the whole thing is amplified by the fact that I’m languishing in grad school and feel like there’s no possible way for me to be productive. Productivity in grad school is publishing papers that no one will ever read, and I have a difficult time swallowing that kind of productivity. At the end of the day, I don’t feel like I’ve accomplished anything–even if I have put in a 70 hour week.
So I’m actively trying to step away from grad school for at least a few years. I feel like I’ve gotten a lot out of what time I’ve spent earning a masters and starting on a Ph.D., but it has really shown me that academia is not the place for me. I used to think that industrial research was the place for me, but even that seems not to be the case. I would really rather spend my time working on a team that can directly impact the bottom line. So that at the end of the day, I can say more than, “look, I really understand this problem and can theorize about possible solutions.” Instead, I want to say, “Look at this thing that the people around me really needed and appreciate. I was an important part of bringing to reality.” Most of my friends already know about this, and for the most part I’m succeeding in finding opportunities. At this point, nothing about my future is certain, and uncertainty leads to fear (and eventually even to the dark side).